Shoelaces are cheaper than new fins (I found that out the hard way) so strap, tie, glue or staple your fins to yourself anyway you can. Indoctrinate your friends in the art of the whomp and celebrate your joyous aquatic tribe. Be kind to your spinal cord and don't go kissing sandbanks. Be kind to your skin and wear zinc. Don't run with scissors. Commit to the pit. Listen to bluegrass music and shower your local banjo players in free booze. If you're headed to the grave don't blame the hearse. You can't go fishin' in a watermelon patch. Always drink upstream from the herd. Don't dig for water under the outhouse. Don't take advice from 22 year olds.